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The bank was crowded, and Rufus was silently disappointed Madeline wasn't working, but Vincent got the required papers and proceeded to fill them out.
"Thanks again," Reeve suddenly spoke up, breaking a long silence. "This means a lot."
The former Turk glanced up. "No need to thank me." He then went back to the papers.
Rufus and Reeve exchanged looks but said nothing.
When Vincent was through with the paperwork they all went back to the counter, silently holding their breaths and praying this time it would work.
The teller looked the sheets over with a furrowed brow and told them he would have to see the manager.
"This is exactly what happened last time," Reeve muttered unhappily.
"What are they going to find out?" Rufus pointed out. "Vincent hasn't worked for Shinra in years. They're not going to go through the history of the company."
Reeve pressed his lips together and said nothing.
Rufus looked at the older man. "Vincent? Your opinion?"
He just looked away.
Rufus frowned.
The teller returned, looking annoyed and disgusted.
Every hope the men held onto fell.
The teller nearly threw the papers back at them. "Forget it, Shinra scum. You can't trick us. The manager says you're not welcome in our bank anymore. Get out."
Rufus' jaw fell open and he tried to stutter out words that wouldn't come.
Reeve froze stiff.
Vincent had to drag the two of them out before they made a scene.
Rufus stared at the building which had shut him out for good. He was too shocked to be angry and too angry to cry. After long moments of blinking in shock, he finally managed to choke out, "....I...I don't believe it."
As soon as he spoke, Reeve lost control and broke down in tears. Shying his face away he ran off.
"Reeve!" Rufus called, turning to face the direction his friend was heading. "Don't worry, Reeve! Everything will be fine!" He forced a smile, dying inside. Turning to Vincent he weakly pleaded, "Vincent? It will work out, right? Somehow, won't it all work out?"
The former Turk looked at him with lifeless crimson eyes, and with a defeated sigh hung his head. He couldn't look at Rufus Shinra as he said, "I'm sorry."
Vincent went off by himself. There was something eating his life away deep inside him. It gnawed at him because everyone else he had known was dead.
And he wasn't.
He wasn't, and yet he was suffering because of it.
They weren't. They escaped.
Now he carried their weight. And no matter how many years had had slept because of all the pain he had caused, it did not matter. There wasn't a soul who cared. They didn't know how sorry he was and how he spend so many years trying to make up for it. He just couldn't punish himself enough--monster that he was--and now he took blow after blow of hate.
And funny, I deserve it. Every one. But why do I have to stay here and take it? Can't I run too? Leave this slow torture behind and journey into happiness...
Vincent smiled and closed his eyes. Lucretia...I'm trapped....trapped by hate in a world because of something I never asked for. I never thought it would come to this...but I'm lonely, Lucretia. Lonely and tired. He sighed. And I miss him. Miss him more than I can take...
His eyes opened.
By the time he returned to his wife, he had stopped his crying and had a flimsy hold on his emotions. He had to pretend for her. He had to pretend everything would end up with rides off into the sunset and happily ever after. Bria had to be kept happy at any cost to him. Reeve had come too far, fought too hard and given up too much to lose her now. Every moment she was unhappy killed part of him. He'd work hard to be sure every wish she had became reality.
He was drained upon his return, exhausted from the emotional trauma.
She met him at the door, wringing her small hands. Bria was clearly worried.
Reeve stopped, stunned for a moment, and he shut the door. Then he froze. "What's the matter?"
She approached him. "Nothing is actually *wrong*, Reeve..."
Gently he reached out and took her hands in his to stop that blasted wringing. His voice was as soft and gentle as his touch. "Bria....my love...what worries you?"
Her insides melted and the words slipped past her lips. "I'm pregnant."
Reeve made no reaction.
Bria stepped towards him, speaking rapidly. "I know we didn't plan this and that you're worried about money right now, but I felt that I had no right to hide it from you any longer. And I don't' want you to worry about the costs, Reeve, because I love you and we can work through this together." Her hand brushed his cheek, eyes pleading, "speak to me, Reeve. Tell me I made the right decision."
The last thing on his mind for a change was money. Finally coming out of his daze, he blinked, looking down at his wife. "I'm going to be a father?" He couldn't believe his own words.
Bria nodded, tears brimming in her eyes as she smiled back at him. "Yeah."
Even saying he was overjoyed underates Reeve's feelings at that moment. He embraced her tightly, burying his face in her shoulder. "You make me so happy, Bria. So very, very happy. Gods....me...a father...." He smiled, then added, "I never thought....never *dreamed*...." He managed to draw away slightly, looking at her, "I love you, Bria."
"Oh, Reeve..." she snuggled up against him. "We'll be fine, hmn? Just fine."
Despite the elation of the moment and the fact that he ahd forgotten it only moments before, the haunting thoughts of money grasped onto his conscience with a suffocating death grip.
End of Part 4
It would be so easy.
Ever since their return from Midgar Reno had been quiet, and tried to isolate himself best he could from Rude. And although the other man tried the bets he could with Reno's moody and depressive attitude, his fuse was growing weary. Trying to get Reno to come out of his shell was like trying to pull an elephant through a mouse hole. Impossible.
And Reno couldn't tell Rude.
No.
Couldn't tell him he spent ten gil on two bullets--
For himself.
He had had so many thoughts swimming in his head since he returned. Ever since he had seen her he had a feeling of complete emptiness. That there was no hope for happiness now that he was blacklisted. He couldn't work. He couldn't be with the ones he loved and he couldn't cry over it either. Shinra had made him incapable of showing sorrow in such a physical way. There had been no room for tears among the blood then. Now there were no tears for him among the pain. He couldn't even be human anymore. Simple things people took for granted he couldn't have. Food, money, rights, work, family...they were out of his reach.
And anyone without such basic things could only be one thing.
Dead.
Reno would soon take care of that.
There he sat, subconsciously turning the gun in his hands. True, it had never been his weapon of choice, but it was always there when he needed something of fall back on. And now he needed to fall.
The gun finally came to rest in his left hand, and he held it up at eye level, admiring the glistening metal for a moment. My escape. With a tired sigh he took it in a firm grip, finger on the trigger. If I'm going to feel dead, I might as well *be* dead. He lifted the fire arm.
The sound of a door being thrown open startled him and he jumped, the gun sliding out of his grip and clattering to the ground. Reno hissed a curse, then shifted his eyes to the ground, embarrassed at being caught.
Rude was a statue in the doorway a moment. He finally came back to life and a furious expression clouded his face over as he pressed his lips together and strode over to Reno, bending to retrieve the fallen firearm. Silently he opened it, and the two shiny, gold bullets slipped into his hand, gleaming when he sun hit their polished surface. A terrible silence followed. With each moment that went by, Reno felt the anger within him boil. What was Rude waiting for? Why wasn't he yelling and lecturing? He wanted to get it over with. His voice was lifeless. "What?"
"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Rude exploded, his hand connecting hard with Reno's cheek.
The red head put a hand to his face, mouth hanging open. "Rude, you--"
"What happened to you, Reno?" Rude snapped, an edge to his voice the red head had never heard. "You used to be so full of life. Now you can't stand to live another second."
"I'm dead," Reno said quietly. "My soul....my will to live...it gone."
"Whatever happened to the friend I once knew?" Rude demanded, voice shaking. "The one who always said life was too short to waste?"
"I was right all along," Reno replied evenly, still avoiding eye contact with the other man. "Life *is* short. I'm 25, and my life's already destroyed. Every ounce of life I spent. Spent on cheap booze and sex." He scoffed at himself. "What a waste."
"I won't let you do this!" the other man declared, waving the bullets in disgust. "I won't let you be so weak!"
Reno watched in horror as his friend threw the small pellets out the window. "No! Rude!" He leapt to his feet, eyes flashing. "I hate you!"
The bald man put a hand to his face, and that's when Reno realized his friend was crying.
"Rude?" the red head was shocked. "Why are you--"
"I never had anyone in his world, Reno," he explained, "you're the only friend I've got."
"I...." Reno stuttered, "I don't..."
"Promise me you won't do this anymore, Reno. To yourself or to me." He paused to clear his eyes. "We're Turks, Reno. And we don't stop till the job's done."
"I promise." With his word as his contract, Reno embraced his old friend. Rude broke down and cried.
And even now, strangely at peace, Reno couldn't squeeze a tear.
End of Part 5
