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Show me the meaning of being lonely
It was always cold. He shuddered as he walked, rubbing at his frozen skin.
I have no where to go....
So many words for the broken heart
The wind whipped past him and he winced, shaking in his thin, tattered clothing.
But he gritted his teeth, pressing onwards. Sometimes the cold was no so bad... Not when he thought of the fire. The intense heat had taken his family away.
The cold is almost comforting.
It had to see in a crimson love
His feet hurt, but he couldn't stop walking. The temperature made it hard to breathe, but he wouldn't stop.
The air was such a wonderful thing when I came out of the flames. It saved my life. Now it seems like it wants it back.
So hard to breathe
He pressed on with only thoughts for company. He wasn't walking anywhere. How could he when he had no place to go?
Maybe if I keep on walking.... I'll actually get somewhere.
Walk with me and maybe
It was always so dark in Midgar, and the only illumination came from the flickering lights outside the run down homes. He knew at the top of the plate rested Shinra Headquarters, the men and women in suits who controlled everything in Midgar, but most noteworthy was their grip on the Mako rates. Tseng often overheard people complaining about how much they hated Shinra. About how their monopoly was out of control. Tseng could care less. He was just a boy. Just a cold, hungry, tired, lonely little boy who only longed for somewhere to call home again.
Anywhere that isn't this deserted street...
Nights of light so soon become
The nights were the worst. The usually crowded streets were empty, leaving him uneasy, as though someone or something was lurking in the dark shadows. The emptiness only made him colder, and he shivered, his teeth chattering.
I only want it to be morning...
Wild and free I could feel the sun
"Shinra says it's working to fix things," he overheard a man comment that morning, jabbing at the newspaper in hand.
His companion had shaken his head in disbelief. "They're full of crap, not promises."
"The city was just built," said the first man. "This city was designed by some kid, you know. Some seventeen year old genius. Name's Leander or something."
The second man laughed in disgust. "Yeah. It was just built, and all ready we hate it."
It was just built and I'm all ready homeless.
Your every wish will be done
"They're gonna make sure everyone's happy."
"Heh. Nice of you to believe that shit."
I'd like to believe it. I'll believe anything....
They tell me
But he was alone now still alone in the black of night. Though his feet dragged and his eyes drooped, silently begging for rest, he plodded onward, his hands fisted in his pockets.
Where they really lying when they said it would get better? Gods, I hope not...
Show me the meaning of being lonely
Everything seems the same in his weary state. Nothing stood out. He wondered if tomorrow someone would take pity on this poor, lonely soul who knew no one but his four deceased family members.
Are you watching me now? Even if you're not, I like to think you are... Makes me feel a bit warmer inside, and a bit less lonely.
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
He had proven to be a survivor. That had to mean he was strong. That he was strong enough to live through this.
But just because he was strong in body, didn't mean he was strong in will.
I want to be with you. I want to be dead too. Why can't I? Why do I have to suffer on my own?
Tell me why I can't be there where you are
If he had his date correct, it was nine months since they moved to Midgar.
One month since the fire.
And one week till my birthday. I don't even care...
There's something missing in my heart
He sat in the corner, knees drawn to his chest in the dark laboratory. The area where he had been injected still throbbed, and he wondered what it had been this time.
If it's something that kills me, I won't mind. I'm not afraid.
Life goes on as it never ends
He was alone once again. There was no one to comfort him in his recovery. Just the shot and then emptiness. It seemed Hojo better things to do than spend time with this boy he had 'taken in' Sephiroth was frequently alone.
Why does he even pretend he cares at all?
Eyes of stone observe the trends
He held his throbbing arm with a labored sigh. How much longer would he have to stay abandoned like this? Where had Hojo gone? Was there anyone who cared about him? Sometimes he thought so. There was one man who cared. Vincent would stand by his side and comfort him in the worst times. So why wasn't he here now? I need you, Vincent. Please...
They never say forever gaze upon me
Yes. In the worst times. Wasn't this one of those times? His arm seemed to throb more, and young Sephiroth held it tighter, grimacing at the pain. I can never depend on anyone. No one but myself. But it isn't enough. Everyone needs someone. Even me. But there is no one now. Not even Vincent. I'm lonely and in pain. I hardly think it can get worse.
Guilty roads to an endless love (endless love)
The sound of a PHS shook him, taking him from his forlorn state. Probably for the doctor, he thought sadly as he answered with his good arm.
"Hello?"
"Hello? Sephiroth?" Like a call from heaven, it was Vincent's voice at the other end.
"Vincent," the boy breathed, as he was filled with a sudden feeling of peace. "Where are you?"
"Nibelheim. Are you alone?"
"I am." Just as I always am. Come see me, Vincent. "Are you coming home?" It may sound utterly silly, but you are my home, Vincent. You're the only one I care about, and you're the only one who cares about me.
There's no control
"No."
It was a crushing blow. "No?" The boy whimpered, trying not to cry. He wanted to badly to blurt out all his feelings and beg Vincent to return to him. Instead he just grew silent and cried.
"Sephiroth?" The Turk's voice was urgent. "Are you crying?"
"I...." his voice cracked, and he couldn't go on. "....I am."
"Ah.... No, angel. Please. I promise to hurry back and be with you so you won't be lonely. I'm sorry Hojo leaves you alone."
His ears perked up. "Angel?" He repeated quietly, sniffling back the tears.
The Turk seemed almost embarrassed. "I.... You look very angelic, Sephiroth, what, with your hair and eyes." He sounded as though he was turning bright red.
Angel... A beautiful word from my beautiful friend.
Are you with me now?
"You will hurry back to me?"
"Yes. As fast as I can."
"Will you... Will you hug me? Hold me in your arms, Vincent?"
The older man sighed lightly. "Oh yes, Sephiroth.... As long as you wish it."
Green eyes faded shut. "....thank you," he whispered.
"No need to thank me."
Yes. Yes there is a need. I wonder if you realize how much I need you, Vincent.
Your every wish will be done
"I'm sorry. I have to go."
His eyes remained closed. "Hurry."
"Yes."
"Vincent?"
"Yes? Yes, Sephiroth?"
The twelve year old hesitated a long time, unsure of the words he wanted to use. "Good bye," he ultimately breathed.
"Yes, good-bye."
Is it too strong? Is it too scary?
They tell me
And now he was again alone. Sephiroth remained by the phone, his only link to an escape from misery.
Is it too soon?
Show me the meaning of being lonely
He called me, he called me, he called me. Oh, Vincent. Do you know what you mean to me?
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Is this true to what I'm feeling? Do I even know what I'm feeling?
Tell me why I can't be there where you are
I want to be there with you, Vincent. So you could hold me and tell me how I would never be alone. But I am. Can I even believe my own dreams? Can I believe what my heart tells me, Vincent? What it says about you?
There's something missing in my heart
He sobbed to empty walls. Rufus Shinra was ten years old, but he was not outside playing with his peers. Instead he was inside crying again. Crying because his father would not be coming again, and the only comfort he received was a five minute PHS conversation.
As if that makes up for it. Hasn't he learned by now?
There's no where to run
He had no friends, no one to turn to. No one who would hold him and comfort him while he wept. There was never any consolation for the boy outside the walls of his own room.
These walls are my only friends.
I have no place to go
If walls could speak, what a tale his would have to tell. Rufus confessed the contents of his soul to the paint and plaster. It was little comfort, but his only choice. What an embarrassment it would be if he was seen like this. Rufus, the richest kid at school, a sniveling, red eyed heap of self pity.
Just what I need. To be hated further.
Surrender my heart, body and soul
The conversation with his father had been a joke.
If all the men are liars, my father must be the king.
How can it be
"Sorry, Rufus. I can't come this week. Hang in there."
Hang in there. I'm never coming, *Rufus*. God forbid I called you son.
"You'll be all right."
Good of you to tell me so. I'm glad you bothered to ask how I was, moron.
"I'll see you next week."
When I pretend I can't come again, just so I don't have to see you. I hate you, but I won't say it or act it. I'll just never come, then you'll see.
You're asking me
"Tell me you love me."
I'll never answer that plea. Maybe someday I'll make the same demand, *father*. I don't love you because you've never shown me love. How can you have the guts to ask me to love you when you hate me so?
To feel the things you never show
My heart is empty. Rufus emptied his tears, face down on his bed. I hate you, father. You only make me cry.
You are missing in my heart
Still. I still wish I was with you. Wherever you are. Then I could pretend I had a family instead of nothing.
Tell me why I can't be there where you are
Maybe I will get used to being lonely, father. But I won't ever stop crying. I'll cry because I am hated by all I have in the world. How else am I supposed to feel?
Show me the meaning of being lonely
Tseng walked at dawn, mouth dry, skin stiff and frozen. He walked imagining an empty birthday party with no guests, so presents, no cake, and, most of all, no candles.
Even now I can still feel the fire. It burns on in my heart.
Is this the feeling I need to walk with
Tears still trickled from Sephiroth's closed green eyes.
I only wish I could explain how I feel about you, Vincent. It's so strong that it scares me. But I do know I want to be with you. Always.
Tell me why I can't be there where you are
With no tears left to shed, Rufus lay quietly, his own breath echoing in his ears. He felt empty, blue eyes focused on absolutely nothing.
I wonder how I can live when I cannot love.
There's something missing in my heart
~Owari~